Bright lights, big city, bad people!

Our time of limbo in South Africa has been an adventure all of its own.  We arrived back in South Africa on the 23 January and took up residence in Pretoria which lasted all of 50 days.  The first few weeks we spent enjoying the luxuries of city life, a private bedroom with a double bed, a bath with running water, a cupboard to unpack our clothes into, shops close by, slabs of chocolate and delicious home cooked meals.  But with those luxuries of the big bad city comes the big bad people. 

Barry left for Uganda as planned on the 2^nd March and right away I felt like a part of my soul was gone.  Considering that we have hardly been apart in the 7 years of our relationship, I took it quite well I think, until my boat was rocked, my patience was tested, my faith in the universe shook and my friendship, with whom I assumed was my good friend, failed dismally. 

So here is the long and the short of it, and of course without naming names, but I know the people involved read our blog and so know who they are. 

 

On the 16^th March, Baz had been in Uganda for only two weeks, always worried about Joshua and I, missing us terribly while in a strange country far away from all that he knows and loves.  And BAM life as he knew it was all shot to hell!

Early hours on this day in March I was accused by an apparent prominent lawyer and her family, situated in Johannesburg, of being her younger brother’s drug dealer.  I endured abusive phone calls and sms’, hysterical screaming from a person who is apparently this prominent lawyer (who should in my books behave in a more professional manner) threatening me with the police and child welfare.  I was instructed to leave the property that I was renting a room at, at the time.  I was told that I was a disgusting mother and that my children deserve better. I was also told that this particular family had read my Facebook wall and my blog and that they ‘know what kind of person I am’.  

LAUGH OUT LOUD, what kind of person I am?  Hmmmmm, considering that this is the only family on this planet that doesn’t like me out of the thousands of people whose paths have crossed with me in my lifetime, I would say then that YOUR OPINION OF ME DOESN’T COUNT.

Why was I accused of that?  Because I smoke marijuana.  Yes, there you have it.  I smoke marijuana!  Do I smoke it every day? No.  Do I sell marijuana?  No.  Do I go and buy marijuana from the local guy on the street corner like a junkie?  No.  Do my children go hungry?  are they abused in any way, do my children think or love me any less? No.

I smoke marijuana because I choose an alternative lifestyle, I choose NOT to take anti-depressants, I choose to make use of alternative medicines instead of taking those harmful drugs prescribed by doctors.  I choose not to educate my son in accordance with that bullshit that is taught by the corrupt school teachers of today. I choose to stay away from anything to do with politics, I choose a life of travel with my life partner and my child because we choose not to conform to the norms of society.  And my hairstyle of choice… dreadlocks. 

 

Hmmmm… could that be the reason why this family chose me as their scapegoat instead of actually taking their own son to task and ensuring that he takes responsibility for the choices that he makes in life.  Ensuring that the police were involved in the so called 'bust', instead of trying to entrap me into something that, I actually had no involvement with.  Instead of buying and lying their way through life?  What kind of future does this boy have?  The mightier you are the harder you fall, so they say.  So let the mighty then fall hard.

Wow, how sad that one family, just one family can be that shallow and overlook the fact that their son is actually the drug dealer and addict.  How sad that one family believes that they have a right to try and destroy good people with accusations when they in fact are the ones who are the very example of those who are destructive and ooze evil into society.  How sad that this family believes that their son is innocent and everyone around him are the ones to blame for his drug soaked lifestyle.  Phew!

Anyhow, so since the 16^th March, Joshua and I have been doing the best we can with the little that we have had and boy have we done real well.  We are super blessed to have some very special people in our lives, people who came forward and opened up their homes to us. Friends, who actually live up to the status of being our friends.  Friends who took us in, offered us support, advice and always put Joshua’s welfare first!  Real special people who have a real special place in my heart.

Joshua and I have stayed in five different homes in the last 8 weeks!! Not an easy way to live as every home has their own ways which are not our ways. But yet they made space when they didn’t have any and they did so without judgement.  Travelling with our backpacks, camping mattresses, a sleeping bag and a pillow, we backpacked like true champs.

I am so grateful that Joshua is the free spirited boy that he is, because 99% of today’s children would not have survived this adventure the way that he has.  Always smiling, always doing his bit to make this adventure exciting and happy.  Always taking time out of his busy day to put his arms around my neck and squeeze me so tight while reassuring me that “everything will be alright Mamma”  What a boy he is.

 

The saddest thing for Joshua was coming to learn the truth about his 'friend', this youngster, who was the reason why we went from being safe and settled while Dad is up Africa, to being home-less, unsettled and real sad at times.  It’s a sad lesson to learn at the age of 5, but he now has a very good understanding that he is NOT to trust anyone, not even his friends because it’s usually those closest to you that will hurt you real bad and let you down in life.  Our boy is now so much wiser.

So here we are, our last few days in Jozi.  We are in a good place, we are packing, shopping, packing and shopping some more.  Joshua and I are extremely excited to be joining Barry in Uganda soon.  Another awesome adventure is about to begin.  

Grateful, to be showing the middle finger to those who have been the cause of some heart-wrenching moments during the last few weeks.  Sad, to be saying farewell to those that we love and miss the most while we travel.  Super excited to be reunited with Barry again.

Today I say thank you to those of you who have opened your homes to Joshua and I, for one night, a weekend and up to two weeks.  Thank you to those of you who have taken us out for a meal and reassured us that all will be good.  Thank you to those of you who have bought us a few groceries and ensured that we have been fed and taken care of.  My list of thanks is endless. 

My most important thanks go out to Barry who is thousands of km’s away and has supported me and believed in me every step of the way.  Who has continued to love me unconditionally and who has motivated me to just keep on going.  This man, who has sacrificed so much for the greater good of his family. 

And me… I am stronger, more spiritual and I am even more convinced that our choice in our alternative lifestyle is the right way and the only way!  People will befriend you and they will stab you in the back whilst acting in a cowardly manner.  Those people are the very kind that I dismiss out of my life without hesitation.  I see that we are surrounded by nasty and destructive people.  Those people have no space in my life.  Ever!

I have always believed in KARMA and phew, I must admit, I don’t feel an inch of sympathy for those who have karma knocking on their doors, if not already, then soon.  The karma bus is on route and I am the driver ;-)

Bring on our new adventure.  Time to leave the bright lights of the big bad city behind.  Time to go where we are always happy. Time to continue our African dream xx

Remember to educate yourself before you accuse someone.  It will save you from and those around you from a whole lot of hurt.  Don't be a coward, if you want to know then simply ask.  Don't go and spread nasty rumors because at the end of it all, it is you who is un-liked, not trusted and your life will be filled with loneliness and bitterness.  

Peace, love and happiness always!

Blu

Life on a sailing vessel...not for the feint hearted!

I blogged a while back about life on a boat and that was merely covering what it is like living on a vessel of some sort, (I say so because we have 'lived' on many) but not detailing what it is like to be crew on a sailing vessel, which is totally different. So today I will tell you more about my experience as a crew member on board a sailing vessel.

First let me start with the correct terminology so you have a better understanding of what it is I am referring to:

1. Cabin - a bedroom.

2. Head - bathroom: small toilet, A basin and a shower head which is the nozzle on the tap in the basin. Drainage holes for the water.

3. Saloon - lounge/diningroom: definitely not a salloon as we know it!

4. Galley - kitchen: usually small, only one person at a time.

5. Cockpit - helm and seating area which is outside.

6. Foredeck - the front deck area of the vessel.

7. Starboard side - the right side of the vessel.

8. Lockers - cupboards, found all around the vessel, used to store items safely.

9. Port side - the left side of the vessel. Thanks to our sailing buddy, Shaun Tarr, who explained it like this. There is too much port left. Meaning the port side is on the left. :-)

10.Hatches - windows

Walking around on a vessel takes concentration, balance and at times good strategy! When you are anchored you are able to walk around, get boat chores done and possibly a good night's sleep. This is not the case when you are sailing, crossings or island hopping. The minute the anchor is up and you move into deep waters, the boat rocks and roles continuously until you get to the next anchorage and you lay anchor. When I say 'rocks and roles' I mean that everything moves and so do you. Walking is an adventure, to get from the cockpit area to the galley, which is 6 steps (in my steps) you have to stand up, compose yourself, find some sort of balance in your sea legs, hold onto the table, then the door, then the counter and then into the galley It's best not taking too long to accomplish this adventure. If the weather is bad, the waves are higher, the water sprays in from all angles so everything is wet including you, walking becomes that much more difficult and frustration levels increase quickly. I have found that crawling is usually best and if you can't crawl then whatever you do next just do it with style!. Eventually you don't care what your butt looks like from behind. LOL!

The doorways of all vessels are lower than those in a home. I would say only about 1.5 meters in height. It reminds me a bit of a submarine, with those small oval shaped doors that seal when they are closed. This results in a whole lot of head injuries if you are tall. Thankfully I am short so moving through on on a vessel is easy.

So back to the cabin. "ooh so I'm claustrophobic", I hear you say. Yes your are right! This is usually a small space, cramped, with a bed that is higher than what you would be used to in your home. The bed for me is usually way to high, with me being 5ft tall and all, I always need some sort of a box to stand on to hoist myself up onto the bed. The box always being Barry's camera case! Thank goodness we have had this camera case with us throughout out travels or I wouldn't have managed to get into bed at all. The mattresses are hard and thin, so please don't think that you will have a great night's sleep on any vessel. If you do it's because you have consumed way too much rum and you have passed out for the night!

The heat in a windless anchorage is a killer. Avoid it whenever you can. Not a drop of air or a breeze passes through your boat. If that happens then you kick back, siesta and swim.

You simply CAN NOT have tidy cabin lockers. I have tried for 8 months now being the tidy freak that I am. You have to hoist yourself onto the bed, to get to the lockers, and if the vessel is rocking and rolling then you simply grab the first item of clothing and pull quickly to get it out. If you haven't mastered the art of removing clothes from a locker, then all the clothes come out with that one item you are after. So what's the best solution? just bundle it all up and shove it all back in, with the thought that you will simply repack again when you have time.

The head is pretty cosy, the toilet is just big enough to fit your butt onto. They remind me of the small toilets you find in a nursery school. Ideal form me, cos my feet still touch the ground! They remind me of the toilets you find in a nursery school. The toilet is usually one of those that you manually flush. So you fill the toilet bowl with water, do your business, then you pump at least 10 times, this flushes your business through the pipes, then you have to close the sea cocks (this is the valve that allows the water into the toilet) and pump another 5 times to empty the bowl again. If you enjoy reading on the toilet then this kind of toilet environment is not for you! There is no time to read while the boat is rocking and rolling. The room is also small so the stink can kill a person. It's best to do your business and get the hell out of dodge!

Your showers are usually cold, so don't for a minute think that you will enjoy a warm shower after your night watch is over. This is usually when you crave a warm shower the most. Because you are always in 'concerve water mode' its best to run 250ml of water into the basin. Soap yourself down and then use the shower to wash the soap off. You can not simply hang around under running water for the sake of hanging around under running water. If you are blessed and anchored in chrystal clear water then you simply jump into the ocean, climb back onto the boat, soap yourself with 'colgate shampoo' (the only shampoo that lathers in sea water), jump back in the sea to wash the soap off and then back on the boat to rinse the sea water off with fresh water (sweet water). If you don't have enough water on board then you simply don't shower until you do have water.

Better yet, always have a solar shower packed in your backpack! you will love every minute of your showers!

Showers in the rain are the absolute best, when it starts raining you strip to your bare essentials, lather yourself up, arm yourself with a mop and you go onto the foredeck. That way you get to shower for as long as the rain lasts and the boat gets a good wash too. Don't be shy, every other 'yachtie' also does it, some more brave and do it in the nude, others in their costumes. Warning! Don't shampoo your hair! I repeat, Don't shampoo your hair. The rain doesn't last long enough to get it out. Either way, its an experience to tell your grandkids!

By the way - You usually looked beautifully tanned, just a friendly bit of advice, the top 2 layers of brown are usually dirt and when you wash at least 3 times you will see that your 'tan' will fade...lol ;-)

While sailing, water is the damndest thing! Collect rain water when and wherever you can! from the rain, from a lonesome tap at midnight (covert operations...lol!) or you have to buy water from a mariner. The crew must always ensure that water is a priority because you don't want to get caught in the middle of a crossing without water. When it rains, you have to line every single empty container up at the water catchers and you fill them and now you have to work in the rain. So what if it's raining and you will get wet. You can deal with your bad hair do later (later never comes by the way) and the bruised ego about slipping your ass off.

The boat is only neat and tidy while you are anchored. Its easy to tidy and clean when you are not rocking and rolling. When you sail its the complete opposite, the tools are out in the event of something on the engines needing attention, so the saloon area becomes a workshop. Dishes will pile up unless you are as skilled as I am and can wash, dry and pack dishes in the middle of high swells! Plain and simple...it looks like a bombs hit it!

When you are anchored you have to get stuck in and work like a hound dog! Wash windows, sweep the carpet, wash down the floors, repack lockers, wash down the heads, do your laundry (by hand), get your laundry washed and dry, clean the dingy and kayaks, clean the bottom of the boat, feed yourselves (because you haven't eaten properly in a few days), go shopping, have a shower because you probably stink! and the list goes on.

When crossing from one country to another you are out at sea for a few days and nights. Our first long crossing was 4 nights and 5 days, this was from Curacao to Colombia. Just when I thought I was equipped to handle night watches and possibly crazy weather, NOT! On the first night during my watch, 11pm to 2am, we sailed right into a rain squall. The wind was crazy, the rain was pouring, the swells were high, I was soaking wet, I couln't see through my eyes with the amount of water pouring down my body! And through this chaos you have to watch for giant tree logs in the water and tankers. Ha ha ha! anyway I survived that episode, at the end of my watch i dried off, put on a sarong and attempted to sleep. Thats not easy when the waves are crashing and everything inside of the boat is creeking or knocking.

On the 4th night, Joshua, Barry and I went to sleep leaving the Captain to handle the watch, we sail into another squall, which lasted the entire night or so it felt, we didn't close our cabin hatch properly, a huge wave hit us from the port side and swoooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooshhhhhhhhhhhhhhh, we were woken with about 50 litres of water pouring onto the 3 of us. What a way to wake up! Wet, ice cold, 2am, dark, waves crashing, the Captain cursing! What a crazy experience.

"Well at least I you're in paradise." I hear you say. In my mind, paradise = peacefulness, tranquility, splendour. Well yes, that does very much exist and I have 'lived' that way for the last 7 months. Now we are anchored in the harbour.' We are anchored right off the Old City and the Town with rolling suburbs behind the high rise buildings lining the promonade.

As you, who live in the city, have taxi's, busses, bicycles, people etc etc, so we on water have 'water taxi's, fishing boats, speed boats, power boats, yachts, dingies, cruise ships, tankers.. etc etc. There isn't a quiet time on these waters. The rocking and rolling here is driving me crazy..lol. Like when you hike and climb to the top of the mountain and that wind just blows and blows and blows? Like chinese torture at times :-).

Saying that though, not always chinese torture. Every day continues to be an adventure, the awesome always outweigh the 'crap' days. Every morning we are greeted by the most beautiful sunrises and blessed good night with magical sunsets.

Life on the water. With only a few days to go until we finish on Moonjoos, I am both sad and extremely excited. Sad because I already miss that peace, tranquility and splendour but I carry it with in me, the smells, the sounds, the views..the very place where I discovered a whole lot more of myself. Extremely excited to be taking all I have experienced and learnt from the Caribbean and living on boats, to the city, back to my daughters, my family, friends and everyone we encounter, especially on our next adventure!

Travel, journey, have adventures, open your world to something new every day!

Blu

　

My life on the road as a woman!

Coming from South Africa and travelling various parts of Africa, the safety of women and children always come's up in discussions and is more often than not a concern for most.  Travelling as a family is very different from backpacking as a family.  With your entire existence in your backpack, your hat on your head, a map and your trusted feet and legs to take you to your destination, with the odd good deal and you get to take local transport of possibly even a taxi. 

The very first time I felt uneasy and felt I was always looking over my shoulder was whilst travelling through Venezuela.  I think the language barrier was a big contributing factor which I look back on now and laugh heartily about!  We never bought a Spanish dictionary before we left South Africa and on arrival at Caracas airport, there are no shops that sell dictionaries.  So there we were with our fingers in our ears for the first 2 hours.  But as I always now find myself saying.. faith does move mountains.  And there before my eyes, stood a person that spoke v e r y s l o w and basic English, from there on everything worked out as planned. 

A 10 minute walk in the searing humidity and hot sunshine to the local departures ticketing offices.  Each one a small cubicle with a no English, irritated looking person.  From there we hopped on a local bus which took us to a hotel on the one side of town.  From there a cab to the long distance bus station.  In between all of this driving and sight seeing, there are just hundreds of scooters and old style motor-cycles.  The drivers and passengers either wearing no helmets or cycling helmets...lol!  They add to the chaos, people everywhere, all busy with everyday life. 

At the station and there we waited in a pretty dirty, stuffy, loud and busy multi level 'spaza shop' style area.  Meat being cooked and sizzled in close proximity, stray dogs lazing about, others playing with eachother and some just watching the people go by.

Three hours pass and we finally board our luxury liner bus.  This was a welcomed relief to our tired bodies and over excited minds.  Our plan was working, we enjoyed a good nights sleep in comfy seats.  A 16 hour bus ride and we woke up to the most breath-taking views of the jungle, green and beautiful as far as my eyes could see, ahead, up and behind.

And there we pull up in the furthermost town of Guiria!  It felt like we were in a desert town, with no water, searing heat, dust, strange smells, some friendly people and others that really made me feel uneasy.  This is where Joshua and I stayed in the hotel most of the time, where we viewed from the safer place.  This was our own choice as we are aware of the human trafficking concerns across the world.

It was a welcomed relief to board the ferry for Trinidad.  There we were welcomed and assisted along the way by local people and officials.  We walked along the main street at eight in the evening and sleep soundly for the night.  Leaving Trinidad posed to be a bit difficult with all the searching of travelers but it's their process, we complied and we then took another three flights until we landed on the Island of Grenada.

This is where we are currently visiting whilst sailing the Caribbean.  Here I felt instantly at ease when we entered the airport.  Immigration and customs officials were all helpful and eager to give you assistance.

Here I am able to catch a local taxi from one side of the island to the other, by myself, with no worried.  That is for me, amazing.  How many of you catch local transport in your city?  I can visit the beach with Joshua and not have to watch over my shoulder in fear of being robbed or raped.  Here I can walk through the bush from one bay to the next by myself. 

This Spice Island, Grenada is a wonderful destination for travelling families, for those of you who prefer to take the road less travelled, for those of you wanting a taste of the Caribbean way of life.

Our life is now a journey, in Crocs, with a backpack each and a whole lot of faith and courage.  This journey we take together, Barry, Joshua and myself, in my heart and soul...Kaelah, Christine and you, no matter where you are in the world :-)

I wish you a magical day!

Blu